Disheveled Story Of Everything

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Internal Battle

I would stand over my dead body

knowing that i couldn’t hurt to feel alive


Its the one thing I haven’t tried

Maybe it’ll be the only thing to make me see

that life was worth living

-the fight


Daily Prompt: Youth

via Daily Prompt: Youth

This is more than just a daily prompt.

Let’s touch on the recent release of the monstrous ‘Pokemon Go’. For those who are unsure about the game-play: basically, it is a game application downloaded into your smartphones. The game uses virtual reality (VR) technology to stimulate the iconic Pokemon game. Players ‘collect them all’ (referring to the characters in the game) by catching the Pokemons. They are then allowed to Battle other players to claim leadership of Pokemon Gyms and so on.

The wave first hit Australia. I admit that I anticipated its release due to the intriguing game-play. I used to play Pokemon when I was a kid and this game brings back memories to me. I was in Japan when I saw a friend posted about the game. Sure, he hacked it because he is staying in Asia, so did I. I couldn’t play it in Japan though because, obviously it wasn’t officially released yet. A week after that, news on FaceBook flooded with everything Pokemon Go.

I became disturbed by the fact that this game has easily won over the world’s attention within a night. The dreaded day came when the game got released in Singapore, where I live. Everyone around me began getting involved in it. Sometimes too involved. We don’t notice each other anymore. Our priorities change. Our relationships are jeopardised. It dawned upon me that humans have made machines that overpower themselves. Youths are not supposed to be isolated in their own little bubble of technology.

This is what the world has become. How can I trust my future into the hands of youths whose aspirations are to become Pokemon Go trainers. Who forego education, jobs and families to ‘catch them all’. It is a dire situation when a simple mobile application can so manipulatively takes over someone’s life, control it, use it and abuse it.


Daily Prompt: Maybe

Maybe I should’ve slept earlier the night before, because today was a bad day. The morning was fine, although I had to work on a good Saturday. There goes weekend, but what the hell, a girl has to survive. That was not even the saddest part of the weekend. I realised I have been dropping hair everywhere, literally. Maybe I have been stuffing my face with too much junk food in the office. Whatever the cause, I might go bald very soon and that is worrying.



via Daily Prompt: Maybe

I’ll Never Forget What It Was Like To Love You — Thought Catalog

Skye JonesI remember rolling over in bed and opening my eyes to the view of your starry face. With a million constellations all over your body. I remember waking up and wanting to kiss you but I didn’t want to destroy the way your body seemed to be perfectly sculpted to the bed. The way…

via I’ll Never Forget What It Was Like To Love You — Thought Catalog

Did I Make It Too Easy For You To Leave? — Thought Catalog

kellywoodThere was never an us. It was always this uncategorized thing where we were just hanging out, laughing, sharing our dreams and childhood stories, kissing. There was no label. I don’t even know if it’s apt to call it a relationship. It was just a thing that you and I did. It’s funny how my…

via Did I Make It Too Easy For You To Leave? — Thought Catalog

He is Tired, You are Tired

Bravo! you did it again. You’ve managed to drive another good guy crazy. You’ve successfully made him fall in love with you to not answering any of your calls late at night after a fight.

Congratulations! You’ve struck his nerve to the bones that he swore to your face when he apologised he wouldn’t do it again after the last time. You’ve given him another chance to blow up at you because of the things you’ve said, or not said.

As if the last straw wasn’t enough to make you realise how bad everything is going on for you. Time and time again, you’ve placed yourself in a position for people to hurl at you. You placed this upon yourself. Maybe all the problems that have been piling up till now were caused by you.

Think about it. If you hadn’t asked about the sleepover, he wouldn’t have lied. If you weren’t so needy by nature, you wouldn’t have needed to ask. Who is it to blame now then? Stop pushing the blame to the ‘broken family’ situation or the ‘overwhelming stress at work and school’ dilemma. They’re getting old. Really. Stop.

He’s tired of you. He’s tired of the shit you’ve put him through. He will not answer anymore of your calls because he has finally realised that he doesn’t have to put up with you. He has finally woken up from his little fantasy to finally understand he wasn’t the problem. You are. After a couple of months and you’ve managed to slap him out of your life? Cheers to you.

There he is trying to make ends meet, doing everything he could to salvage what you had. There you are making a huge mess of the whole thing, AGAIN. He gave you chances after you chances and you blew it over and over. Let me ask you…

What’s wrong with you? Why do you act this way? Who made you like this?

I am a broken glass


You know, girls are like porcelains. Like the doll that they are, polished, beautiful and fragile. I’m more of a broken glass. I’m in pieces, sharp and well, broken. Broken glasses hurt people that’s why nobody goes near them. If they do, it’ll be too shattered to fix that they sweep the broken pieces up to discard.

I’m a discarded broken piece of glass. I’m transparent but inside I’m vulnerable. I’m hard on the outside but not any more because a glass can only hold so much pressure. You could say that I topple myself over and break my own heart from the choices I’ve made. But I knew when I saw my own pieces on the floor every night that I can never piece them back whole again.

While I’m distracted trying not to shatter, you saw me broken. Unlike porcelains, I’m not pretty. I am chipped, not chiselled. I’m plain, not decorated. I take no shape from the world, I am my own solid being. I live for a purpose and not just aesthetics. I thought I would scare you away or make you take a broom to sweep me off.

I am dangerous, yet you took the sharp broken pieces with your bare hands. While I try not to let another piece fall, you’re trying to fix the ones on the floor. Sometimes you hold everything together, even the unbroken ones. On bad days, the broken glasses you’ve somehow fixed, shatters again from the inside out, like a bullet shot through. You’ll sigh, nonetheless, pick them up again and glue them back to me.

Until the day when I can hold myself up again, thank you for holding me up. You could’ve chosen a beautifully crafted porcelain but you didn’t. For that, I love you with all the broken pieces that I have and all that’s left of me.

10 Things I Hate About You

I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair.

I hate the way you drive my car. I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind.

I hate you so much it makes me sick; it even makes me rhyme.

I hate it, I hate the way you’re always right. I hate it when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it when you’re not around, and the fact that you didn’t call.

But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you.

Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.

-10 things I hate about you




The words that remained untold

Everything I will never hear from you

Why she had to go, why you had to leave

How you left this family broken with grief

The hands that held my heart

The same hands broke my soul

You are not gentle any more

Like a double-edged sword, leaving scars from every side

I left the open scars sore

It’s not that I don’t feel the pain,

It’s just I’m not afraid of hurting any longer

You will never clean up the mess you’ve made

Neither will I try to piece something you have broken because…

you will break it again







15 Hauntingly Beautiful Poetry Excerpts For When Everything Inside You Hurts — Thought Catalog

Milly Cope1. “I need you to be a monster / which is to say, I am trying not to love you / which is to say, I am still dreaming of kissing your claws.” — Fortesa Latifi 2. “I said to the sun, ‘Tell me about the big bang.’ The sun said, ‘it hurts to…

via 15 Hauntingly Beautiful Poetry Excerpts For When Everything Inside You Hurts — Thought Catalog